Augusta, Maryland - At approximately 11:25 last night, firefighters responded to a gas main explosion Roger’s Pet Emporium. No people were harmed, but several dozen kittens perished in the cat-tastrophe. While details are fuzzy, there is no indication that this was a case of arson.
“Sometimes these things just happen,” said fire chief, Julio Cortez, “something obstructs the gas pipes, pressure builds, that and a couple other factors, and you got an explosion.” It was a purrfect storm of circumstances. The exploding gas main is thought to have ignited a shipment of hamster bedding, which spread the fire that much more quickly.
Roger Strickland, owner of the pet shop, said that he was “just glad no one was killed,” and that the disaster really made him paws and consider his good fur-tune. He says that he plans to rebuild, and he mourns the loss of the animals that were whiskered away to kitty heaven.