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Horoscopes

Libra: The eclipse of Mars by Venus suggests that you have a secret admirer! But do that special someone a favor, and act surprised when he sends you your first letter written in his own blood.

Scorpio: People often tell you that the truth will set you free. While this may be true in an existential sense, the truth will almost definitely get you 3-5 years in a medium security prison.

Sagittarius: You might have to make the best of a bad situation. It would be advisable to watch Weekend at Bernie’s, just in case.

Capricorn: Things seem to be spiraling out of control. Now would be a good time to pull back on the throttle and even things out before you drop below cruising altitude.

Aquarius: Things in your life will become clearer, and you may have some newfound regrets. Like waiting so long to see an optometrist.

Pisces: Sometimes you have to let people you don’t like take the lead. Just remember, the early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

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Articles

Date	Title	Hits
04/22/2012 21:04:12	Murray Ready To Accept Blame For ‘Getting Everyone’s Hopes Up’ If He Doesn’t Beat Nadal	2456
04/22/2012 20:55:27	Argument of Footballers Getting Paid More Than Doctors Takes A Surpise Turn	2905
08/11/2011 11:43:54	Sarah Palin Shoots Down Presidential Run Criticism, and Critics	916
08/01/2011 13:24:58	Debt Deal Within Reach: Sources say a deal has been approved to lower taxes and protect entitlements	3153